Necessary City

I’m walking in hard rain in East Liberty
            no umbrella   keeping direction by
the Cathedral rising

over the roofs of this city I swore
            I’d never live in.   Nico and Kai shop
in Giant Eagle. I know

he’s taking good care of him   probably
            making him laugh   feeding him
cheerios. I could leave   get in my car

and drive away to the big world before
            anyone would realize.
Yesterday I was daydreaming   panicked

and turned too soon   missed
            the Armstrong tunnel and drove up
Mt Washington trying to get to the South Side.

I could see that busy strip bending behind me
            in the mirror   but I was heading high
and away, above the three rivers—

Allegheny and Monongahela rushing
            into the Ohio—a shining
blue body   arms up in surrender

the hills bright with sunset   the fountain
            at the Point plunging
back into concrete, a few people watching

growing smaller and smaller.
            I live in a city I sometimes hate.
I have no job to write on the doctor’s forms.

When my child cries   I often freeze.
            I walk toward my family   the smell
of heavy rain in my hair, wanting

a way through—but I chose these people
            who put up with my skittishness.
I want to run toward this city of my life

like the heroine at the end of the film once
            she’s learned what really matters.
But I just walk a little faster

counting the lights in old warehouses along
            Centre Avenue bright squares cutting
the grey Pittsburgh air.

Pittsburgh Quarterly is now accepting submissions for its online poetry feature. PQ Poem is seeking poetry from local, national and international poets that highlight a strong voice and good use of imagery, among other criteria. To have your work featured, send up to three previously unpublished poems in Word or PDF format as well as a brief bio to pittsburghquarterlymag@gmail.com. Simultaneous submissions are accepted, but if work is accepted elsewhere, please alert us.